Tuesday, April 2, 2013

News From the Believers: Harvard Destroys Miracles

Sister Miriam Godwinson begrudgingly admits that news stories demonstrating the continuing influence of her teachings might be too easy to find from time to time, but nevertheless is glad to see one of her followers, Pat Robertson, correctly attribute blame to Ivy League universities for the apparent lack of convincing miracles in recent years. Ordinary miracles like sunsets and new births are common enough, but the truly astounding miracle like those  prevalent in earlier times are all too few, a state of affairs best attributed to elite secondary educational institutions.

"Why do miracles 'happen with great frequency in Africa, and not here in the USA?' asked a 700 Club patron named Ken. "People overseas didn't go to Ivy League schools," Robertson replied with a chuckle.

According to Robertson, it's the "skepticism and secularism" that is being taught at "the most advanced schools" around the country that is keeping God's miracles at bay.Meanwhile, Africans are "simple" and "humble." "You tell ‘em God loves ‘em and they say, ‘Okay, he loves me'," said Robertson. "You say God will do miracles and they say, ‘Okay, we believe him'."

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